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My first real heartbreak, I'm happy?

Started by Pokeh, July 30, 2011, 05:49:05 AM

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Pokeh

July 30, 2011, 05:49:05 AM Last Edit: March 30, 2019, 04:54:54 AM by Pokeh
x

LightRequiem

ive read everything bro, dis some wrack shit you got der

Pokeh

Fast reader. :/

And I've swallowed all of this down with little to no help from substances. What should I do then?

LightRequiem

July 30, 2011, 06:03:01 AM #3 Last Edit: July 30, 2011, 06:05:03 AM by LightRequiem
i dont know how you really feel and shit so i cant give you like really tips

& i dont do long distance relationship shit :-\ -- its like eating something that you dont know

or go hang out with her.. like go to a movie or something romantic orso to see if you still feel something for her n she for u
^probably not possible?

Allie

Love is defined differently by all; no one can tell you if you are in love with someone, before or now.

Ask yourself a few questions..
If you found out she was dating someone else, would you be crushed beyond what you feel now?
If she moved into your neighborhood, would you want her more than you do now?
If you would never break up, would you ever love her less?
Did you feel loved by her?
Do you still feel as if she loves you?
If she told you she hated you, and she meant it, would you still love her?

..if it's true love, it doesn't fade.
True love is eternal; if you feel any different now than you did before, you mistook true love for desires and illusions of love.
Questions such as the ones mentioned will tell you simple..whether you are still in love, or whether you just convinced yourself you were in love because you liked the feeling of being loved by her, or whether it was just a temporary illusion.
..no one can answer this for you.


Pokeh

@Light: she's 5000 km away from me, a movie date would be lovely though :/

@ Allie: to pretty much all of your questions it shows I truly do love her. I honestly feel that attached to her. I have questioned our relationship before, and was terrified but willing to accept and move on, but promised myself she'd still have a place somewhere in my heart.I mean she still does. Then why was I so happy over the fact that it may have been over?

Kevin

Ask yourself what Allie just said and get with your friends (close friends) and smoke a little weed. Then while you're high, think about her and tell yourself this is my lucky girl.


^Works trust me, your psychological state when stoned (with close friends) has been proven to make you feel 2 times better, if you've been smoking weed alone, well don't when something like this is going on.


Pokeh

I get what your getting at but it's not like I'll be high all my life with her. It's good for thinking about situations that are less serious. And it works. Just that with this big of a mind-heart contradiction it will be hard regardless

Allie

The human mind is complex, and everyone reacts differently to different situations.
If you were happy that you and your true love are over, there are many reasons that exist, and not all of them mean you're not truly in love.


Think to yourself some of these reasons, and ask yourself if any hold true:

Perhaps you have no confidence that you and her will ever actually be together; you've thought to yourself long and hard that you've put yourself in a shell for this girl for a long time..has she been the same? Have you, kilometers upon kilometers away, been holding her back from what could be going on in her life?

Or perhaps, on the same track, you are starting to feel she deserves better? Seeing you for one month every few months at maximum is not what she deserves, but better?

Maybe you just want some time to yourself; there's a time for love and a time for alone time -- everyone has felt this, even people DEEP in love. Suffocation in a relationship is almost worse than being without your love.

And negatively thinking..maybe just a glimmer in your mind wanted it to be over; you love her, but you are tired of long distance relationships, and you're tired of waiting for the time to come for you to be together forever. Now that it's over, you have a while of rejoice, though it often follows by regret, and often comes with confusion; you want her back, you love her, you just don't want to have a long distance relationship.

AllEyesOnMe

July 30, 2011, 06:46:59 AM #10 Last Edit: July 30, 2011, 06:47:56 AM by AllEyesOnMe
The only girl I loved till now said  she "loves me too much to get under the blanket" with me, the other were hoes..
And NO endless walls of text can ever define love(so I won't bother) you have to feel it.
                                                                                       


Pokeh

July 30, 2011, 06:51:32 AM #11 Last Edit: March 30, 2019, 04:55:05 AM by Pokeh
x

Yz

DISCORD killyzkill

Allie

Two years ago I went through the same exact thing you're going through right now..
..my solution was to wait it out; time heals all wounds, even heart-piercing ones.


There are several directions you can go from here, I can't tell you the solution that will work for you, and I regret that, but I can tell you the paths you may take:

Wait it out single for awhile; you'll feel the agonizing pain of the break up and be hurt and confused for many days to come. However, some day in the future, maybe you'll be able to get back with her; and it wouldn't have to be a long distance relationship then.

This is not suggested in any way, but some people might choose to help the pain caused by this by getting out and finding someone new; even the illusion of being loved by someone else helps to yield the pain from the loss of love by your true love.

Or..obviously..you can talk to her about getting her back. This might temporarily satisfy your unhappiness, but you'll just be starting the cycle once more until you're able to end the long distance relationship and be together in person without the worry of having to leave. I would only suggest this if one or both of the following conditions are true: you're afraid she'll meet someone new before you have the opportunity to be with her in person, or it won't be long before you can be together forever.

Iridion



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thats how we roll maddie

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